Have you been struggling with forgiveness? Has someone hurt you so deeply that you’ve carried it with you for a very long time? Learning more about our karmic lessons can help us to achieve something we have never been able to achieve before, total forgiveness. It give us an understanding that we never thought possible. What if you considered the idea that you entered into this life and all other lives in order grow and overcome challenges that have held you back from lifetime to lifetime? What if you considered that some of the people who are in your life agreed to help you in that process? This would mean that they have to behave in ways that inspire you to remember what you came here for. They may even have to hurt you deeply for you to grow in an area that you might otherwise never have grown. Take a good look at your life. Look at patterns in relationships and figure out what your soul may be trying to achieve in this lifetime. Are you being disrespected and unsupported? If you are there is a good chance you are working on self esteem, self worth, and independence. Are you addicted to alcohol, having relationship issues, and over indulging in a variety of ways? If you are there is a good chance you are working on impulsivity and relationship issues. These are just a few examples of the kinds of things that are worked on in our lifetimes. The list goes on and on and the combinations of people and interactions that it takes to fulfill these lessons are countless. Every time we avoid a consequence we most likely will have to relive the experience again until we gain the wisdom needed to fulfill the karmic lesson. So how does forgiveness enter in to all of this? Once we have this understanding we begin to realize that there are no victims in the world. That we are all agreeing to and living out the consequences of our own planning of our own lives. That’s a lot to absorb and to let sink in. No longer can we feel sorry for ourselves or upset with those who have brought us the much needed lessons in our lives. This doesn’t mean we have to stay in or get out of any certain relationship, but it does mean we have to not fall victim to it. You have the choice of detaching and becoming centered and balanced in your own being. To be able to see things as they really are and choose differently about how you feel about it. Just because someone betrays you doesn’t mean that you have to carry anger and feel victimized. You have really two choices you can end the relationship and therefore feel more self esteem because of it or you can realize you are not very self assured and recognize the trait in yourself and take steps to correct it. Sometimes we are just not in a place where a major life change is an option. We have businesses to run, families to raise, and a variety of other complex issues that sometimes prevent us from moving out of challenging situations. By recognizing that you are working on yourself and that is why these karmic lessons have come about and that those involved are also doing the same thing. We can make some very good choices. It is possible that someone who you have had some very trying times with is having a lesson that they are not able to overcome or control. I use the example: I love chocolate, when I have had my fill I make the statement, “I am done eating chocolate.” In that moment I mean it with every fiber of myself. Then a week or two later someone comes a long with a box of delicious chocolates. I forget all about what I said and I eat the chocolate. Now granted eating chocolate is not as damaging as some behaviors are but, just the same this is how weak that some people are in a variety of other areas. It isn’t that they don’t want to control themselves, it is that they have agreed to have the lesson of impulsivity and it is so strong with in them that try as they may they can’t overcome it. Depending on the consequences of their behavior will determine their growth. The more damage control those around them do without acting on what they have done, the less likely these souls are to get the growth they need in order to overcome lessons they are working on. Someone who is working on over impulsivity will usually couple with someone who is working on self esteem, self worth, and self love. So both souls have opportunity for growth in areas that are needed with in themselves. So the next time you feel sorry for yourself or angry at someone who has “wronged” you, consider your role in it. Know that they like you are struggling with what they have done the same as you are struggling with what they have done to you. In this way you will start the process of feeling compassion and forgiveness isn’t far behind.