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<channel><title><![CDATA[Blog4Change.org - Comments for article: THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org</link><description /><language>en-us</language><copyright><![CDATA[http://www.blog4change.org]]></copyright><generator>N/A</generator><webMaster>webmaster@blog4change.org</webMaster><lastBuildDate>Tue, 09 Jun 2026 10:35:21 UTC</lastBuildDate><ttl>20</ttl><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4625</link><description><![CDATA[I would like to thnkx for the efforts you have put in wrinitg this web site. I'm hoping the same high-grade site post from you in the upcoming also. Actually your creative wrinitg skills has encouraged me to get my own website now. Really the blogging is spreading its wings quickly. Your write up is a good example of it.<br/><br/>
Comment posted by David at 6:05 am, Mon 24th Aug 2015]]></description><author>no@spam.com (David)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Mon, 24 Aug 2015 06:05:44 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4625</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4439</link><description><![CDATA[Very nice site!<br/><br/>
Comment posted by Pharme807 at 12:00 am, Sun 1st Jun 2014]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Pharme807)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Sun, 01 Jun 2014 00:00:02 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4439</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4438</link><description><![CDATA[Very nice site!<br/><br/>
Comment posted by Pharmd36 at 3:46 pm, Mon 26th May 2014]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Pharmd36)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Mon, 26 May 2014 15:46:02 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4438</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4437</link><description><![CDATA[Dead written subject material, Really enjoyed studying. eeddfeeceaae<br/><br/>
Comment posted by Johnc528 at 10:15 pm, Sun 25th May 2014]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Johnc528)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Sun, 25 May 2014 22:15:21 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4437</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4306</link><description><![CDATA[Thanks<br/><br/>
Comment posted by x431 diagun at 3:06 am, Thu 23rd May 2013]]></description><author>no@spam.com (x431 diagun)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 23 May 2013 03:06:29 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4306</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4257</link><description><![CDATA[An interesting thing happened. Right about the time I was finishing reading part 2, my 19 year old daughter called and was very anxious about a new hairstyle she was going to try. I told her she was beautiful and that no hairstyle would ever be able to take that away. She said it made her feel better. It was wonderful to actually play that out for real. Thank you.<br/><br/>
Comment posted by Rick at 8:16 am, Mon 15th Apr 2013]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Rick)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Mon, 15 Apr 2013 08:16:41 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4257</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4261</link><description><![CDATA[HI RICK- Great job with soothing your daughter's worry. She needed you to "mirror" her beauty back to her, so she could remember the happy reality of her loveliness from within herself. As I explain in the article, in the long run our happiness and emotional security comes from seeing our own beauty and worth FROM WITHIN OURSELVES. That is, achieving the state of Self-Love and Self-Validation. But children and adolescents aren't able to fully do that on their own, as we adults can. They need us to mirror their beauty and "rightness" until they have the emotional independence to do that for themselves. So you've given her a great "running start" with your affirming and encouraging attitude toward her. BRAVO- BRYAN<br/><br/>
Reply to Previous Comment by Bryan at 8:59 pm, Fri 19th Apr 2013]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Bryan)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Fri, 19 Apr 2013 20:59:38 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment4261</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3921</link><description><![CDATA[As  Monty Python once sang- "Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spammmmmmm"!<br/><br/>
Comment posted by BRTAN EDEN at 4:40 am, Sat 20th Oct 2012]]></description><author>no@spam.com (BRTAN EDEN)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Sat, 20 Oct 2012 04:40:32 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3921</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3215</link><description><![CDATA[Bryan   your blogs are the most worthwhile read on the entire site.  Continue on with them. Thank you .<br/><br/>
Comment posted by D Clarkson at 8:33 am, Wed 9th Nov 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (D Clarkson)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Wed, 09 Nov 2011 08:33:36 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3215</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3216</link><description><![CDATA[Thank you very much! I will definitely keep the blogs coming- it gives me great pleasure to share what I have learned, and to know I am being helpful to the folks who are reading them.<br/><br/>
Reply to Previous Comment by BRYAN at 5:36 pm, Wed 9th Nov 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (BRYAN)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Wed, 09 Nov 2011 17:36:58 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3216</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3072</link><description><![CDATA[Thanks Mattie!<br/><br/>
Comment posted by BRYAN at 10:19 am, Sat 30th Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (BRYAN)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Sat, 30 Jul 2011 10:19:52 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3072</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3068</link><description><![CDATA[Home run! Great slugging with that aneswr!<br/><br/>
Comment posted by Mattie at 9:30 am, Sat 30th Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Mattie)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Sat, 30 Jul 2011 09:30:50 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3068</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3049</link><description><![CDATA[You are welcome, Cactus.<br/><br/>
Comment posted by BRYAN at 8:20 pm, Fri 29th Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (BRYAN)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Fri, 29 Jul 2011 20:20:23 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3049</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3038</link><description><![CDATA[Thanks for sharing. Always good to find a real eperxt.<br/><br/>
Comment posted by Cactus at 2:45 pm, Fri 29th Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Cactus)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Fri, 29 Jul 2011 14:45:27 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3038</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3025</link><description><![CDATA[You're very welcome Cynthia - and thank you! Yes, you have the worry-free attitude that so many wish to have, but can't achieve. At least, not yet! Good for you. For the majority of people who are still trapped in "the worry habit" - like your mother-in-law - I offer this philosophy and practical technique. I hope it helps!<br/><br/>
Comment posted by BRYAN at 5:42 pm, Wed 27th Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (BRYAN)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Wed, 27 Jul 2011 17:42:06 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3025</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3022</link><description><![CDATA[Love this article. Thank you for sharing. I think I will share this with my mother in law as she is always worrying about something. 

I am The only one of many in my family who do not worry. I don't think that worrying will change the outcome of the situation and therefore why should I make myself sick? So when people ask me how I can be so calm during my trials, I simply tell them that worrying only makes it worse and it doesn't change the outcome of the problem I am facing. 

Thanks again for sharing....It was a wonderful article.<br/><br/>
Comment posted by Cynthia at 12:06 pm, Wed 27th Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Cynthia)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Wed, 27 Jul 2011 12:06:16 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3022</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3000</link><description><![CDATA[HI SANDY - Here's where we differ - and interestingly, it's on the fundamental point of my entire blog.
 "You say this:"However, I continue to feel that the worry, fear and needs most people experience are not our own 'feelings'". This is our basic disagreement.
Just as anger, or sadness, or love, or joy etc. are human feelings - so certainly is fear! Fear is an emotion like any other. Our emotions as human beings - both the pleasant and the painful ones- are very real and valid. They originally arise as a response to real circumstances. If one sees one's feelings as "unreal", one may without knowing it be rejecting and invalidating one's genuine self. Most people do this to some degree, to suppress emotions that are too painful to deal with (without more support). To the degree this occurs they are - as Pink Floyd would put it - "comfortably numb". 
One cannot "choose" to be rid of an emotion. Thinking that one is doing this is actually suppressing it, burying it and denying it's existence. Instead, feelings - especially the painful ones like fear, or sadness - need to be accepted, expressed and released. That way, they are gone for good and not buried. 
So we will disagree on this key point, it seems. Thanks for the opportunity to clarify! BRYAN<br/><br/>
Comment posted by BRYAN at 8:55 am, Thu 21st Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (BRYAN)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 21 Jul 2011 08:55:08 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment3000</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2994</link><description><![CDATA[I feel that people worry because they do not take responsibility of their own feelings nor believe that they are in control of their own feelings. That is why even when they feel "bad", ie the worry feeling, they don't just stop it.  People likes to indulge in the feeling that things/feelings/their own lives are out of their control even though it is not true.  Each person's life is just a sum of their own choices.  Therefore, by definition, each person has total control over their own lives.<br/><br/>
Comment posted by Sandy at 7:05 am, Wed 20th Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Sandy)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Wed, 20 Jul 2011 07:05:38 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2994</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2995</link><description><![CDATA[HI SANDY - Thanks for reading the blog, and for your thoughts. Feelings are meant to be lively and spontaneous things, and they energize us when we allow them to flow through us freely. If we choose to "control" our feelings - whether they are the happy ones such as love, sexuality, joy, peace, excitement, etc.; or the painful ones such as fear, anger, sadness - we end up suppressing/burying them. They don't really go away, they just "go underground". And thereby we restrict and deaden ourselves. So to be fully free and alive we need to de-control our feelings, give them full permission to live, to be - and then learn how to work with them constructively. For example, to learn how to feel and let go of the painful ones - like fear and worry! - and to enjoy the happy ones. So to be completely self-accepting - and awake and alive! - the choice needs to be about allowing ourselves to fully have our emotions - and then to work with them constructively. Does that make sense? BEST - BRYAN<br/><br/>
Reply to Previous Comment by BRYAN at 7:36 am, Wed 20th Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (BRYAN)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Wed, 20 Jul 2011 07:36:21 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2995</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2997</link><description><![CDATA[Hi Bryan,

Thank you for your reply.  What you said does make sense.  However, I see it a bit differently. I see 2 separate things. 

There are "feelings" and there are invading thoughts/negative programing/pre-conditioned believes like worry and fear and needs.  These invading thoughts, most people misread them as "feelings".  The invading thoughts actually make you "feel terrible", because your body is telling you they are "bad" for you. When you realize how invading and how they control your life and how they decrease the quality of your life, you will naturally cease them from taking over you (ie stop worrying and take responsibility of your own life back).  In this case, you regain control and from there you can actually start to trust your "Feelings" because you feel good about these feelings/intuitions.  

Your own true feelings and intuitions will NOT make you feel out of control or emotional, they will only help you get what you want, guide you and motivates you.  For example, in unfavorable situations, your feelings would guide you instead of make you feel worry, scared, or dependent, because your feelings will tell you calmly that you would rather do something else.  You therefore, would calmly and confidently change the situation to suit yourself.<br/><br/>
Reply to Previous Comment by Sandy at 3:56 am, Thu 21st Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Sandy)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 21 Jul 2011 03:56:20 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2997</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2998</link><description><![CDATA[HI SANDY - What I have learned - both from my own experience of worrying and from extensive experience with clients, is that what seem to be "invading thoughts" are actually "the tip of the iceberg". What I mean by this is that frightened, worried thoughts that feel to us like they are "invading" our minds are actually being generated by deep feelings of fear that are stored - unconsciously - in our bodies. Invariably, the fear that generates chronic worrying, "invading" thoughts in adulthood originated in childhood traumas and frightening conditions over which we - as children - had no choice and no control. Because these painful feelings of fear and insecurity were suppressed - that is, controlled by limiting our breathing, tensing our bodies and thereby pushing the feelings down into the unconscious - we have forgotten the original experiences and emotions. But the fear we needed to suppress to cope and survive continues to exist in our bodies and unconscious minds - and it is this old, stored-up fear (the massive "iceberg", unseen beneath the surface) which generates our worrying, invasive thoughts (the thoughts being the "tip" of the iceberg). 
So when you conceptualize worrying" as simply/only being  "invading thoughts/negative programing/pre-conditioned beliefs", what I am pointing to is that while these certainly exist (and they must be dealt with!) they are themselves being generated by and perpetuated by strong, buried feelings of fear and insecurity stored in our bodies and unconscious minds. And that to thoroughly and permanently stop worrying - without suppressing the fear more deeply in order to further numb and "take control" of it! - it is necessary to get in touch with the emotions of fear stored up in your body, understand where these feelings originated - and release them from your body and mind simultaneously.
I have found, over and over, that people who try to free themselves of worrying, "invasive" thoughts by only working with their thoughts (positive affirmations, visualizations, etc.) get "stuck in their heads". Because while they try to free themselves only by working with disciplining and/or shifting their thoughts, they stay disconnected from their bodies - where the vast emotional "iceberg of fear" will remain.
This is why I counsel people who want to stop worrying - permanently! - to work with their bodies, minds and emotions simultaneously. For example, I'll have them get more and more deeply in touch with their bodies, so that they can actually feel the fear stored up inside - and have them express and release that old fear, physically and emotionally. At the same time, I will have them "catch themselves" when they are having worried thoughts, and either simply "drop the thought" (the approach of zen meditation) or put an affirming, positive thought in its place. But as I say, this latter work with one's thoughts will only yield limited results unless it is combined with the work with releasing the stored-up fear in the body. 
Hope this makes sense! BEST - BRYAN<br/><br/>
Reply to Previous Comment by BRYAN at 5:29 am, Thu 21st Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (BRYAN)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 21 Jul 2011 05:29:34 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2998</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2999</link><description><![CDATA[Hi Bryan,

Thanks for the explanations.  I did want to understand your theories about how these things work :)

In general, I think we are saying similar things. However, I continue to feel that the worry, fear and needs most people experience are not our own "feelings".  You used the word "stored" in "they are themselves being generated by and perpetuated by strong, buried feelings of fear and insecurity stored in our bodies and unconscious minds. " which I interpret that fear and insecurity are not really part of us/our feelings in the first place and therefore, can be rid of simply if we want to get rid of it. 

I totally agree with you that if we don't fully trust our real feelings and intuitions to guide us, but instead only use positive thoughts, the results are limited.  

Cheers,
Sandy<br/><br/>
Reply to Previous Comment by Sandy at 8:37 am, Thu 21st Jul 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (Sandy)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 21 Jul 2011 08:37:44 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2999</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2960</link><description><![CDATA[Thanks John. Yes, you have voiced my philosophy exactly (-: But as I'm sure you know, the "worry habit" is a devious and tenacious one so most folks will need an effective way to combat it and ultimately let it go. Hence the blog! All the best to you also....<br/><br/>
Comment posted by BRYAN at 8:01 am, Sun 5th Jun 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (BRYAN)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Sun, 05 Jun 2011 08:01:01 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2960</guid></item><item><title><![CDATA[THE STOP WORRYING EXERCISE]]></title><link>http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2956</link><description><![CDATA[Yes Bryan: Worry is a problem for so many people and what is that saying- most worry about things that will never happen. So why worry,
be happy....all the best....<br/><br/>
Comment posted by John Kitsco at 1:53 pm, Sat 4th Jun 2011]]></description><author>no@spam.com (John Kitsco)</author><pubDate><![CDATA[Sat, 04 Jun 2011 13:53:24 UTC]]></pubDate><guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.blog4change.org/articles/3837/1/THE-STOP-WORRYING-EXERCISE/Page1.html#Comment2956</guid></item></channel></rss>